Read Job 10-15
One of the wealthiest and best-known businessmen in our community committed suicide recently. He was 65 years old. His family issued a statement that he took his own life “after a battle with post-Covid-related symptoms, including severe tinnitus.” It’s heartbreaking when individuals get to the point they no longer desire to live and deliberately destroy themselves.
Exact statistics are not readily available, but indications are the suicide rate during the pandemic has increased significantly. A December story in an Arizona newspaper described a 67% increase in teen suicides in 2020 compared with 2019 in one county. Psychology Today posted, “America is Facing a Teen Suicide Pandemic,” which raised similar alarms.
In the book of Job, we read this disturbing statement, “I loathe my very life” (Job 10:1). Job seemed dangerously despondent. While he didn’t commit suicide, he admitted he wished he were dead or had never been born. “Why did you bring me out of the womb? I wish I had died before any eye saw me. If only I had never come into being, or had been carried straight from the womb to the grave” (Job10:18-19).
Have you ever felt that desperate? Have you ever been so filled with such despair and self-loathing that you didn’t care to go on living? If so, Job’s experience may provide some helpful insights about how to survive when you abhor your life as it is.
First, remember that you’re not the only one who has been there. Job struggled with a feeling of gloom, and so did Elijah, the prophet who asked God to take his life. The Apostle Paul once wrote that he despaired even of life. Abraham Lincoln and Winston Churchill battled dark moods of depression, and many Godly, successful people have walked through the valley of the shadow death and yet endured. You can too.
It’s also helpful to identify the cause. Maybe you’re down because you have a bad attitude, and you need to count your blessings and think positively. But perhaps, like Job, you’re struggling because you’re going through some horrific circumstances. Sometimes there are valid reasons why life doesn’t seem worth living. There is “a time to weep and a time to mourn.”
Don’t expect friends to sympathize with you for very long. Job’s friends tried to cheer him up, but their mercy gifts lasted about a week. Then they started urging him to repent and get over his sorry attitude. If your misery is prolonged, you’ll find that even close friends lose patience with you, and it’s best not to complain to them very often because “those at ease have contempt for misfortune” (Job 12:5).
Express your feelings openly to God. Job said, “I will give free rein to my complaint and speak out in the bitterness of my soul…I will say to God: ‘Does it please you to oppress me…while you smile on the schemes of the wicked?” (Job 10:1-3). Honestly, expressing our frustrations to God helps release some of the toxic bitterness we feel and paves the way for spiritual healing. You’ll find the Lord completely understands and deeply cares for you.
Be alert to the opportunity to witness. C.S. Lewis called pain God’s megaphone since He speaks to us loudly in our suffering. But pain is also God’s spotlight. When we go through tough trials, people watch closely to see our reaction. Try to get your mind off your hurts and focus on being an example to others who are watching you. Job’s example has encouraged Bible readers for centuries. Maybe your children, grandchildren, and future generations may be inspired to toughness by your perseverance.
Don’t expect a quick solution. Sometimes life is dramatically turned around in a day as it was for Joseph, but more often, relief is a long time in coming as it was for Job. Admiral James Stockdale was a Prisoner of War for seven years during the Vietnam War. He insisted the prisoners who were the most optimistic about “Getting out by Thanksgiving” were the ones who didn’t survive because their hopes were quickly shattered. Those who were realistic about the possibility of prolonged incarceration were the ones who endured. Be realistic, you may have to hold on for a long time, and it’s important to nurture a persevering mindset.
Finally, maintain a stubborn faith in God’s goodness even though you don’t understand God’s ways. Job insisted, “Though he slay me, yet will I hope in him” (Job 13:15). That’s a tenacious faith! Have confidence that there is light at the end of the tunnel for you also. You have the unfading hope of eternal life. Paul wrote from prison, “For to me, to live is Christ to die is gain” (Philippians 1:21). That’s the kind of stubborn faith that endures even through severe trials when life seems loathsome.
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