John Foster & wife Doris
John Foster died last week at his home. He was 84. He often said he didn’t want to waste away in a nursing home but he wanted to be carried out of his house in a pine box. God honored his request.
John served for many years as chairman of our elder board and was like an older brother to me. I could go to him for counsel and get the straight scoop. We could talk man to man without having to tip-toe around feelings. After I retired he was a big help to my ministry, traveling with me to speaking engagements, helping to conduct elder’s seminars and participating in monthly minister’s retreats.
In preparing for John’s funeral I thought of 2 Samuel 3:38: “Do you not realize that a prince and a great man has fallen in Israel this day?” What was it that made him special to so many people?
He was a frugal businessman but was generous with his money.
Until his retirement at age 58, John had been an executive with Proctor and Gamble and played a significant role in the success of that company. But there are numerous effective businessmen who are wise with investments. One of the qualities that set John Foster apart was that he was very generous with his resources.
John and his wife Doris have always given sacrificially to the church as an expression of their love for the Lord. But like the Macedonians in the Bible, they did more than expected and supported various parachurch organizations and worthy missionaries around the world.
After I retired, every year John would take me out for a birthday lunch and give me a generous check for Bob Russell Ministries. It was unsolicited. “Just want you to know I appreciate what you’re doing,” he’d say.
Something else that made him special to me was that John was a spiritual man without being self-righteous.
John Sampson expressed the feelings of a lot of people when he said, “John Foster was the one man I looked up to most in the church. He was the rock.” A lot of people felt that way. No one doubted he loved the Lord and the church. Everyone knew where his priorities were. He read four chapters of the Bible daily with his wife and sought to apply the Scriptures to his life. The fruit of the Holy Spirit was evident in him.
But he was able to be a spiritual man without an air of haughtiness or self-righteousness about him. Like Jesus, he was full of grace and truth. He loved God’s word but he also loved people, understood their foibles and was patient with them.
He didn’t fit the stereotypical image of a churchman who is a fun-hating legalist or a rank hypocrite. He took God seriously but didn’t take himself too seriously. He could laugh and make fun of himself with self-deprecating humor.
John related that shortly after retirement he started raising a few cattle. When one of his calves got sick he put it in the back of his station wagon and took it to the vet. The veterinarian treated the animal and as John put it back in the car to cart it home the vet said, “Mr. Foster, for cows, we come to you.” John laughed at himself since he didn’t realize veterinarians made house calls. There was little pretense about him.
He was a great family man but gave his family freedom
John and Doris were married for 64 years. Their personalities were very different. John was practical and methodical. Doris is more spontaneous with high mercy gifts. Doris is a multi-talented woman: a good Bible teacher, an excellent cook with a wonderful gift of hospitality, but she has a special knack to counsel the hurting.
John gave Doris space to exercise her gifts. She took in a lot of strays and wounded people. The Foster home was a combination hotel and hospital, a quick, delicious restaurant and a long-term rehab center.
Once, when John thought a woman was repeatedly taking advantage of Doris’ magnanimous spirit, he got a little exasperated that Doris wouldn’t say ‘no’ and her mercy gift was costing him a lot of money. About that time, I congratulated him on 56 years of marriage. He responded, “I’m convinced the first 56 years are the hardest.”
There was no doubt John loved Doris and was devoted to her. Doris said almost every night when John crawled into bed beside her he would say, ‘This is my favorite place in all the world.” He loved Doris and gave her space to minister and utilize her gifts.
He loved his three children and would brag about their achievements. He would have preferred they all stay in Louisville but he gave them space to spread their wings and they wound up in Mississippi, North Carolina and Ohio.
John Foster & Family
John was also proud of their 5 grandchildren. Each felt like they were their grandfather’s favorite. John and Doris did a good job of keeping the family close by making regular phone calls and frequent visits.
A few years ago John decided to take the entire family on a trip to Hawaii to create a memory and promote harmony. He said, ‘Now the things we do together, I will pay for. You are free to go off on your own and do some other things if you prefer. But you pay for that.” He later told me, “We were never a more together family than on that trip!”
Something else I appreciated about John was that he was an encourager, but not a flatterer.
John Foster was a great encourager to many of us who weren’t his children. He’d stop by the office of a staff person and ask about their ministry and offer to pray with them. His genuine concern boosted them up. Occasionally he’d say to me, ‘I’ve never heard you better than last night.”
What made him such great encourager is that he sometimes confronted error and sought to correct it. Paul told his understudy, Timothy, “Preach the word, be prepared in season and out of season, correct, rebuke and encourage.” (2 Timothy 4:2) Encouragement actually means more if it’s balanced with some correction and an occasional rebuke because then you are confident you are being told the truth and not just being flattered.
Galatians 6:1 says, “If a brother be overtaken in a fault, you who are spiritual should restore him gently.” That’s one of the things that made John such a good encourager…he could approach a sensitive subject with gentleness so your feelings weren’t hurt.
Shortly before I retired I used a phrase in a sermon that he thought was inappropriate. I talked about a couple who were “shackin’ up.” In the culture I grew up in that was a common phrase. But in John’s culture that was a vulgar phrase and it disturbed him. A few days later he said, “That phrase you used in the sermon last Sunday, “shackin’ up” that didn’t sound like a Bob Russell phrase.”
That was so gentle. He didn’t say, “I thought that was the most vulgar term I ever heard in the pulpit.” Or, “I was so disappointed in you!” Or, “I’ve talked to a lot of people who are very upset.” He simply said, “That didn’t sound like something you would normally say.” I received his rebuke well because it was gentle. I told him, “John, I’m never going to use that phrase again…when you’re in the audience!’
Photo from The Southeast Outlook by Stephen Powell
One other quality that made John a prince and a great man was that he was an excellent leader by being a humble servant.
John was a leader of leaders – chairman of the elders, chairman of the compensation committee, chairman of the “Making Room for More” campaign. John Foster maneuvered us through the uncertain waters of raising millions of dollars and completely relocating the church.
But he wasn’t too proud to do the dirty work or serve in the most menial task. He accepted a minor role in the Easter pageant as a non-speaking Pharisee. He came regularly to the church building on Monday and counted the money donated the day beforea task he performed the day before he died. He entertained little children on his farm. When the church was searching for an administrator, John filled in for two years at a dollar a year and did an excellent job.
God resists the proud but gives grace to the humble. We do too. Jesus said, “The greatest among you will be the servant of all.”
When the doctor came into the counseling room at Baptist East hospital and confirmed to us that John could not be revived and that he was gone, Doris’ first words were, “Well I know where he is.” Indeed. “To be away from the body is to be at home with the Lord” (2 Corinthians 5:8).
I am confident John is in heaven and I don’t sorrow as those who have no hope. But I wanted to publish this tribute to my friend so that you would “…realize that a prince and a great man has fallen in Israel this day.”
“Therefore, “Stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain” (1 Corinthians 15:58).
Follow @BobRussellKY on Twitter
Recommended read: “Southeast celebrates life of former elder, administrator, volunteer John Foster” in The Southeast Outlook Newspaper
